Lack of appetite or low sexual desire

Low sexual desire

The lack of sexual desire is a problem that can deteriorate the relationship and even cause anxiety in the sufferer. Sexologist doctor in Delhi tells you what can provoke it and what to do to recover the spark of passion.

What is lack of appetite or low sexual desire

Inapetencia or low sexual desire are diverse and elusive concepts generated by our society. Depending on the approach from which we approach the issue we can reach a definition or another, it all depends on the colour of the glass with which you look.

If we want a very specific and concise definition, but always from the perspective that this will mean a loss of the magnitude of the human sexual act, we can say, as stated by sexologist in Delhi - that it is an absence or deficiency of fantasies and desires of sexual activity, persistently, that causes intense discomfort in the person suffering from it or difficulties in the interpersonal relationship.

However, in this matter it is very important to ask ourselves what we are talking about when we talk about desire. Is this desire linked only to activities related to the genitals, the excitement and the achievement of orgasm? Or on the contrary, we open the door to relationships that do not follow an "all or nothing" approach; that is, they enter a world of erotic-affective caresses and sensualities valuable in themselves, which may or may not lead to orgasm, penetration or high levels of excitement?

In addition, it is important to distinguish between sexual inapetencia and the desire for different sexual frequencies and rhythms in the context of the couple relationship. The latter is quite common, since rarely do members of a couple desire the same frequency for their erotic and sexual encounters, nor the same practices. Therefore, the member of the couple with less sexual desire does not necessarily have lack of appetite or low sexual desire, since there is a wide margin for erotic diversity, says the best sexologist in Delhi.

Causes of inappetence or low sexual desire

The causes of sexual inappetence can be biological, psychological and sociocultural. In general, the three types of causes are interrelated, since the human being cannot escape his biopsychosocial nature. Consequently, what affects one sphere interferes and influences the other two.

In the biological sphere it can happen that our hormonal level is altered, for example with low levels of testosterone; or that we should take a drug that interferes with our sexual response, such as antidepressants; or we suffer from a disease such as chronic pain, diabetes or fibromyalgia. All this has an impact on our biology, therefore on the functioning of our sexual response and our desire.

In the psychological sphere, the causes of inappetence can be found in the ignorance of the erotic-sexual functioning of one's own body, as well as unrealistic expectations about what to expect in a sexual encounter. In turn, the perception of low satisfaction is a frustrating experience that leads us to avoid future sexual relations. Boredom and routine lead us to get little pleasure. And the fear that the requirement of "measuring up" can cause, can block us and generate in us an avoidance behaviour. We reject the opportunities of a sexual encounter to avoid that unpleasant sensation of fear or anxiety, of shame.

Other causes of lack of appetite or low sexual desire are stress and depression, as they cause a series of psychological and physiological changes that are detrimental to sexual desire.

And suffer other sexual difficulties such as problems of erection, premature ejaculation or pain during intercourse will also interfere with our desire, because these difficulties negatively affect the image we have of us and the perception, personal and shared, of our sexual and erotic satisfaction, says top sexologist in Delhi.

In the sociocultural sphere we enter fully into the field of interpersonal relationships and in the field of social norms about how we should function, what is expected of us or should we expect from the other. These norms generate expectations and realities that are mediated by the sociocultural framework that we have been learning since birth, and give us the pattern of the so persecuted 'sexual normality'. The intensive search and concern about normality can affect sexual desire.

In the relationship with our partner, conflicts of interest, resentment or distrust, and routine sexual activity ... can be causes of low sexual desire of one or both partners.

Symptoms and signs to identify lack of sexual desire

First, the most significant symptom to identify the lack of appetite or lack of sexual desire is a decrease due to the interest that sex arouses in its different dimensions.

This decrease in interest in sexual matters is often accompanied by specific behaviours such as the following:

Ø  We often avoid the proposals of erotic and sexual activity proposed by our partner, for example with the typical expressions: "no, now I do not feel like it", "is that I am very tired" or "better another day, darling".

Ø  It diminishes our initiative to propose sexual activities.

Ø  We masturbate less often than before.

Ø  We avoid situations in which we know that our partner can propose a sexual encounter, such as going to bed when she is already asleep or filling our free time with activities to prevent moments of intimacy with our partner.

Ø  But, above all, one day we realize that sex is almost absent from our preferences and that it rarely appears in our thoughts, unless someone brings up the subject.

Over time, and if this situation has been causing conflicts in the relationship, any gesture of approach can be perceived as a danger and, instead of being a pleasant experience that activates our desire as it did before, it seems an annoying experience and unpleasant that we want to avoid.

When we reach this stage, this gesture can provoke anxiety and fear towards the consequences of our sexual inappetence, and it can lead us to feel that we are forced to have a sexual activity to avoid a problem or the bad mood of the couple. However, obligation and desire are two great enemies. At this point, we could recognize that we have entered a vicious circle that causes an emotional distancing and an increase in conflicts in the relationship that, in turn, continue to fuel a decrease in our sexual desire.

Treatment of inappetence and low sexual desire

The way of low sex desire treatment in Delhi will depend largely on the cause of the problem, knowing it is necessary to solve or reorient as much as possible. For example, if we are taking a drug that interferes with our sexual response we can discuss it with the doctor, since sometimes the dose can be decreased or there may be another drug that interferes to a lesser extent with our sexual desire. (Of course, this should always be done with the advice of a specialist).

If it is a couple relationship that has become conflictive, with frequent arguments and fights, marked by a painful emotional dissatisfaction, with few common projects, perhaps damaged by jealousy or infidelity ... it will be essential to work the reunion in the couple, since without this reunion there will hardly be desire.

In addition to addressing the solution of the origin of the problem, to address the lack of appetite and low sexual desire is essential to redirect attention to the sexual; both with internal stimuli (erotic thoughts, perception of sensations of excitement ...) and with external stimuli (caresses that stimulate our senses, reading an erotic text ...). In this aspect, various resources designed to stimulate sexual desire can be highly effective, such as the following:

Ø  Enhance erotic fantasy.

Ø  Elaborate games of seduction between the couple.

Ø  The introspection to recognize own and more genuine desires.

Ø  Relaxation and meditation to reduce stress or anxiety.

Ø  Directed visualizations that empower eroticism and acceptance of the problem.

Ø  The search for consensual novelties with oneself and with the couple.

Finally, and not least, we can consider that our own or our partner's dissatisfaction is a warning sign. Although this sign does not necessarily lead us to consider ourselves a person with low sexual desire, it is important that it motivates us to look for the resources that allow us to transform dissatisfaction into satisfaction, since with the passage of time, dissatisfaction will be a Major ballast for our sexual desire, described by best sex doctor in Delhi.

Emergency advice for couples with low sexual desire

To deal with a problem of lack of appetite or low sexual desire, it is important to consider that both partners suffer. For the person who suffers from inappetence, sexual activity becomes somewhat tedious, undesirable and mandatory. And consequently, you feel under pressure. On the contrary, the person with greater sexual desire often feels rejected, impotent and dissatisfied by a highly unpleasant lack in their sexual and emotional life.

Therefore, the objectives or advice for the person with less sexual desire can be:

Ø  Play with your senses.

Ø  Fantasize with erotic scenes of your liking.

Ø  Search in your interior what you really want and propose it to your partner.

And the objectives or advice of the person with the greatest sexual desire can be:

Ø  Practice autoerotism as an erotic value.

Ø  Work the understanding of this reality: "a couple cannot satisfy all our sexual needs".

Ø  Find ways to improve the cohesion with the couple (despite how painful their sexual inappetence may be) in other areas of the couple's relationship, such as leisure, cordiality, trust ... and sharing, despite the problem, a quality time.

Finally, when inappetence or low sexual desire persists, the most sensible, productive and effective is to consult a sex specialist in Delhi to avoid the side effects of a long-term sexual problem in the couple's relationship.